unexpected friends... unexpected family...

i feel so touched that my boss called for his family and gather around for dinner yesterday. i have been feeling down so i kind of feeling worried of what's gonna happen.

i barely know what to do. just for info, my boss and his entire family have been so concerned about food. all are organics and natural even the soap and shampoo that we are using. yes everything at home. even the things that they put in the food. so we are barely ask to do some meals which by the way is part of our job as the old man's caregiver. 

so at lunch time, i asked my boss what are we gonna be serving for his entire family. there's 2 daughters, i son and 4 granddaughters and my bosses' girlfriend. i really have no clue what are we going to do. but my boss told me that at 5pm, one of the granddaughters will pick me up because we are buying something for the dinner. we are not gonna prepare anything. there will be people that will prepare the place and food. so a big sigh of relief for me. thanks God!

so just right in time, amy came over and pick me up. but i am really puzzled why we seem just going around the town doing nothing until she told me she has to see her friend first and if i can wait in the car. so i did. probably after 45 minutes to one hour, she came out of her friends' house and told me that my boss is looking for me so we need to get back.

i went inside the house looking for my boss, but what i saw right in the middle of the living room is my boss and the whole family. and he asked me to sit down right in the seat that i just thought that have prepared for me. i was out of words and i was thinking that i did something that they want to interrogate or investigate on me.

the first question was, JJ are you happy with us?

i was out of words to say. but after a long pause i was able to say, yes i am! very much and i love the whole family. 

then, my boss' girlfriend made a follow-up question, because we have been hearing you crying for 4 days now. are you sure you're happy with us. and i repeatedly answered yes. 

and my lady boss, Miss N, told me we are just thinking that maybe your recent holiday had shown you some good opportunity and you are planning to leave us. 

That i burst into tears. they let me cry and i can feel that everyone in the room as touched. i can feel hands on my shoulder and Mr. T, uttered, oh my son, what is happening to you? don't you trust me. i am just on the other door. you can talk to me. 

and then my boss, ask me again, are you ready to talk about it? i shook my head. although i really wanted to talk because i have been keeping it inside me for days and i am in deep hurting already, i just cant spread out my problems in that big crowd. although they are just one family. so, my boss told me, if you are not ready, then we will wait for the time that you are ready to talk about it and we will be here to listen to you. we will try to help you but if we cannot, we will find somebody to. 

after my sobbing, my boss who is a very smart and humurous guy made everyone laugh by saying, terrible JJ you cried too much, the food is cold now. just to find out, because of their fear that i might leave my job at them, my boss called his whole family to ask what's the problem and maybe we can do something, so they can keep me. I am so lucky! if only they know that i don't tell stories to my friends of how wonderful my job situation is because they might steal it away from me. LOL!

while on the dinner table, i am slowly loosening up and giving them hint of what i am going through. of course i did not go on details. too personal for them to know. so instead, the doctor in the family, made a call to my doctor, his colleague and good friend, if i can be accommodated the next day. just for consultation. 

i went to the doctor today, Dr. J S, the very handsome fit doctor... LOL! kind of stress free looking doctor. LOL! and he recommended a counsellor that i can talk to... 

yes! i needed counseling because, in my entire life, this is the only time that i feel so much in love that i lost control of myself and it ate my whole being. and i am no longer happy about it. that's not me and that's not healthy.


to be continued...