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Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Wish I could be?

My apology for posting this...
I know I have promised not to post my I securities here anymore...
I just want to release this negative feeling I have
Before going to my appointment this afternoon and
There is no one to talk to.

Wish I could be smart
Somebody who knows how to use words
How to link them
How to understand them especially the metaphors.
The underlying meaning between lines
Of a poem.

Wish I could be brilliant
Somebody who knows the right
Response for everything posted.
A perfect reply for all the messages received.

Wish I am cool, a good artist
To draw, to paint which
We all can make a perfect poem
Or interpretation...
Or a good poet
That we all can make a
Good reaction to ...


But this is me.
Not a poet, not an artist,
Not a fashion guru.

I'm stupid, i am dumb!

I have tried,
Trying, will try
But i know it will never be enough...
And....
This is what you get.
A guy who is madly in love.
A guy who wants to win your attention.

And i'm sorry that I'm not one of those
kind of person you can admire any time of the day
Irregardless whether you're tired, sore or sick.

And I am sorry that what I write,
What I do,
What I care,
What I think
Are not the things that you are into
Or at least interested in.

I hope that one day,
You'll appreciate every little thing I did and doing
To let you know I care... I'm concern...

8 comments:

  1. oh JJ...never care to be something or someone to please another....and if you try...it is soon revealed
    Find you ...your words...(I think you do a great job of expressing yourself..and uniquely)
    find your passion...what lights up your heart..and I don't mean that kind of passion...
    what is it that you like to do....do it with passion
    and life will open its door
    and there you will find everything you need to live an abundant gorgeous life
    and if you don't know what it is..
    maybe get the book
    The Artist's Way....it can help you unlock your creativity...it's work...but it is worth it
    it's by Julia Cameron
    I like you very much..you are funny and personable
    and caring.....don't look to find yourself in someone else....
    it is you alone who holds who you are
    find joy and beauty today wherever you are
    wherever your path leads
    no matter the longing or heartache
    look for the moments of joy and beauty before you
    they will swell your heart

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  2. We are all poets. We are all artists. But we are not high-brow, nor do we hang on walls of museums.

    This post alone illustrates your writing talent, and your ability to eloquently state who you are. But stating isn't everything, as Suz says, "...don't look to find yourself in someone else..." When you look to passion as she says, then others will follow your light and be wanting to bask in it without conditions...

    Much of our writing, art, creation is derived from pain, disappointment, frustration, anger ( and sometimes insanity as with Van Gogh!). But the release of all that into one's natural art form, in a positive, or mediating, or caring way will bring joy to the readers, the viewers, the singers, and to yourself.

    One cannot live a joyful life by trying to create ideals in others. You will always be disappointed if you direct your caring energies in that direction. Those outside our own skins, whether they be friends, family, lovers, employers, whatever, cannot be controlled by our inner ideals of how we think the world should work, or how others should live or act at any give time, and under any particular situation. And I know: I've experienced that!

    But from those sometimes garbled messages comes creation: Whether it be in a poem, novel, music, or whether it is in the following we enjoy from others. Just DON'T judge yourself by the works, words, images, and actions or inactions of others, like Suz says.

    You know yourself, JJ, and that shows in your writing. Just don't doubt yourself, and try not to doubt the intentions of others. Sorry for such a long post!!!

    Anyway, have a good day, and a relaxed mind!!

    (gee....don't know if a blog comment this long will even post!! )

    :) Rick

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  3. @Suz, thanks for being my "blog fairy godmother!"

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  4. @Rick, thanks for the word of wisdom...

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  5. Dear Jj: The path to yourself begins with the first step. Be assured your talent is the same as anyone else. Each individual is precious and appreciated by me! I do not play favourites either, as each does contribute in their own way the full spectral array to make the rainbow. Where would be without a certain brilliant colour missing from that rainbow. And being "no respecter of persons" carries us through this life of experience. There is the answer; we are experiencers and these experiences make us rich in ways we have yet to understand. As to how we each of us does bring to the table a cornucopia of a bountiful harvest is up for debate. All of us are wealthy with every individual's contribution because every light that shines makes this world, this earth, brighter lifting everyone up to the next level of attainment. Each has their own level of performance, and depending on drive and will each should ba able to attain many incremental steps along the way. Rome was not built in a day!
    Take time and enjoy the ride, and the ride of others on the journey to ascending bliss.
    And together we can become anything we dream, and set our intent upon. As we are so much more brilliant than light...we are love!
    Jj, may your lovelight always shine upon us and grace us with the gift of your incredible being! I so appreciate you and ever blogger who promotes the art of blogging and being.
    I so much enjoy reading your excellent blog. Indeed you have added much enjoyment of the entire of blogging experience. And remember the motto "unto thy ownself be true" and "do not compare yourself with others" Desiderata. Wise words to live by, as it allows one to move forward rather than self-doubt holding back. We all have those times when we feel overwhelmed; but we eventually feel at ease again. I hope to excel at this or that, but when it comes right down to it; "I'm just plain Jane. Like me or leave me". (Yes I did rattle on a bit too much too!) Oh well! :)

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  6. I suddenly feel like I'm at home. With the three of you here. With the wonderful words of wisdom. What can I ask for.

    @Chiccoreal, you make me special. Thank you very much! God bless you and your love ones...

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  7. Suz, Rick and Chiccoreal, I'll have these words printed on my blown up picture to hang on my wall... I'll cherish these all my life. My blog family... Love you guys!

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