i'm Gone...

i am suppose to tell you that if one morning you will wake up and i am gone, don't blame me. i already told  you that, i need ten seconds of your every day. but nothings happened.

email you, you won't email me back. yet i have all the proof that you are online. text you, no reply, three days no reply. i dont believe that within 72 hours you never checked your phone. that is crazy... you love blogs because it is part of what you are doing.... tried to do it, but all the world have read my blog, and only you never cared about it. yeah! i know it's a crap... you don't care about a crap blog. ah i remember you told me, who will be reading a blog that is full of jealousy and crap... you are right... no one; even you... read all the old posts maybe you will learn why i needed your attention... I'M SICK! and not even a single word of concern from you...

so goodbye...

thanks for everything. whatever your decision will be i will respect you. but for me this is not gonna work out if you are not gonna put me on your list to check everyday... yes! everyday... it's all my selfishness i know. but, think about this, we are on the stage of knowing each other yet we do not communicate everyday... no that's wrong, i communicate everyday and you don't care... i remember again, this is becoming a distraction. probably i'm not good for an artist, a poet...

ps. don't worry i never doubted your love but i think i am not part of priority... sorry i cannot waste my youth and time to wait until i will be... we will only live once and i want to be happy... i want to be happy... besides, i don't want to be the DISTRACTION to you anymore as what you have said on your last email. this is like end of the world to me you just don't know how. i may sound so brave on this post but i know it will take months of crying on the shower and on bedtime. but better now that i still have the chance to do something rather than later when i already missed all the chances...

we have different ways handling a relationship that's the problem... and without talking it's difficult to meet halfway...